2.30 Bite The Bullet




I’d barely made it to the bush in the corner of the yard in time. I’d been tending to some flowers, when I suddenly felt a rush of nausea coming on. This had been happening a few times a week lately, but this was the first time I’d actually thrown up.



I weakly wiped my mouth clean and looked around if anyone had seen me. Luckily, most of the family was inside. Of course, ever since the first bout of nausea had come up sometime last week, somewhere in the back of my mind a thought had sprung up. Could I be pregnant? Not wanting to get my hopes up only to be disappointed again, I had convinced myself that it must have been some sort of stomach bug. But not that this had been going on for a while, I had to be honest with myself and admit that it was a possibility, at least…



Later that afternoon, after I’d taken a shower and thoroughly brushed my teeth, I returned to the yard to find my husband calmly reading his book on the back porch. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw him, so in his element when he was by himself and immersed in a different world. How amazing would it be if we actually were pregnant?

Finally, Phil noticed me and put down his book. “Hey, baby. What’s up?”



I sat down next to him and smiled. “I just wanted to talk to you about something.”

“All right. Go ahead.”

“For the past two weeks, I’ve been feeling a little funny. Nauseous, tired… And this morning I even threw up.” I giggled. “That’s why the bush smells so funny.”

Phil’s eyes widened and the first sign of a hesitant smile formed on his face. “So… So does that mean…?”

“I don’t know yet,” I said hurriedly. “I haven’t done a test yet. But… I might be.”



Phil’s smile broadened and he grabbed my hands.

“That’s great. Let’s do it! Let’s do a test. Do you need me to get you one? Do you need help? I can hold the cup if you…”

“Phil, stop it,” I laughed. “It’ll be fine.” Even though I’d been nervous before, talking about it with him suddenly gave me a sense of calm.



“I’m sorry,” he smiled. “I’m just excited.”

“Me too.” I looked in his eyes for a while, dreaming about seeing him with a little baby. “Let’s do this.”



I stood in front of the toilet, taking deep breaths. The nerves had come back as soon as I’d kicked Phil out into the hall to wait for me and unwrapped the pregnancy test. What if we’d become so excited, and all for nothing? What if we weren’t pregnant? What if we wouldn’t be pregnant for years, or ever?



Finally, I bit the bullet and sat down. I felt ridiculous talking to myself while peeing, but I couldn’t help it. Please be positive, please be positive, please be positive…




I was pacing up and down the hallway, unable to calm my nerves. Of course, we’d done plenty of pregnancy tests before, but never with such obvious signs of actually being pregnant. I was afraid that Allie would be heartbroken if it turned out to be negative…

After a while, the door opened and Allie came out in to the hallway, her face neutral.

“And? What did it say? Is it…?



To my relief, she started grinning and her eyes sparkled.

“Guess who’s pregnant?”

I let out a cry of happiness and grabbed her. We stood there for a while, just holding each other, enjoying the moment we’d been waiting for for so long.



I grabbed Allie’s hands.

“I love you so much. We’re going to give this baby everything. It will be the happiest little kiddo in the world.”

Allie chuckled through her tears of happiness. “I know. We’ll make sure of that.”


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